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And while I can’t say the sex lives of Yalies represents all college students or even those in the Ivy League, the data from the school about sex is a good reality check.

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That’s the kind of intro you find in most stories about college sex life — and those stories are everywhere.

Feature stories in magazines, multipage spreads in newspapers and posts on feminist blogs would have you believe that, first, only white, straight, Ivy League girls are getting laid because they’re the only ones ever quoted in these articles, and second, these girls have replaced relationships with casual sex … I’m straight, white and female and have just graduated from an Ivy League school, so these trend pieces are supposedly about me. After a year of reading them, I am exhausted by the media’s obsession with the “hookup culture.” Why, besides the obvious reasons, is this topic so irresistible?

This article is about young women, college and sex.

But I refuse to start with a vignette about college coeds hooking up in a frat. Or about a sad senior, sitting in her dorm, reflecting on her previous four years and wondering why she did not find the love of her life, or at least a steady, if mediocre, boyfriend.

Stories about the college hookup culture are so ubiquitous that a recent story in the New York Times made this sweeping statement: It is by now pretty well understood that traditional dating in college has mostly gone the way of the landline, replaced by “hooking up” — an ambiguous term that can signify anything from making out to oral sex to intercourse — without the emotional entanglement of a relationship.

But according to the survey quoted in that same Times article, 20% of female students and 25% of male students have “hooked up” with 10 or more people. But wait — 10 or more people over the course of four years in college? Moreover, the definition of spanned from kissing to intercourse.Nearly every article about hookup culture I’ve read this year has surrounded the Ivies.Hanna Rosin asserted in the Atlantic that the demands of the modern world have left women at these elite institutions with no time for boyfriends, so they are opting out of relationships and into hookups.Thanks to all the media hype, students themselves vastly overestimate how much hooking up is going on at their school.A study at the University of Nebraska at Lincoln found that 90% of college students thought their peers were hooking up two or more times per school year, when in reality only 37% of students reported doing so. Most Ivy League girls are too busy and ambitious for relationships.What’s more, the sex lives of most of today’s college students may not be all that different from those of their parents or grandparents at the same age.

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