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My brain wanted a relationship that was emotionally fulfilling with the potential to be long-lasting. I told the men I dated, "I was with my husband since my high school prom; these are my college years now." I did the experimenting I hadn't done in my twenties. I was just going through my single years later than most people do. But when he jokingly suggested I buy new lingerie, I told him that was In November 2015, I started dating my current boyfriend.

I would be a "good girl" again, finding someone I loved and who loved me back, getting into a proper relationship, and having sex only after an appropriate amount of time. (I still do.) But, I realized that whatever I did couldn't affect him. I owed it to myself and to him to be healthy and careful, but my private life was up to me. I was still seeing a few other guys, too, but I had started to feel different: I wanted to feel strongly about the person I was with.

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I'm a vegetarian, chocoholic and don't drink alcohol (except for cocktails, and even then it's the top part not the bottom part where the alcohol sinks to). I also regularly invite myself over to various friends houses where I raid their kitchens and overstay until midnight.

When I told one of my girlfriends about my new sex life, she said, "Good for you for getting back on the horse!

" Another friend said something I took to heart: that as women, we can claim our pleasure without shame, that our sexuality is a gift to be proud of.

I'm quite a religious person as well so I like to celebrate any religious holiday I can by taking the day off work and enjoying life more!

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The idea that we "should" only have sex within the context of a serious relationship was an antiquated judgment to be disregarded.

And I agree, despite being raised conservatively by a widowed father who taught me that nice girls say "no."I eventually ended things with my friend. Fourteen months after George died, I decided I was ready to date. I did what I felt like regardless of any potential for a relationship. His opinions on sex apparently varied greatly when speaking to a 50-year-old widow as opposed to his teenaged daughter.

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